Peace: a state of mutual harmony between people or groups, especially in personal relations: Try to live in peace with your neighbors. Or: a state of tranquillity or serenity.
Love: affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
Understanding: mental process of a person who comprehends.
And to my personal favorite:
Respect: to show regard or consideration for.
Sounds pretty fucking good, don't it?
Funny how it works. You're constantly told there's something wrong with you and when you can finally put your finger on it nobody believes you. Things are pretty fantastic that way. I've never been through so many emotions in the matter of minutes before and it's constant, it never stops. "That's the way it is." They say. Like you know! Oh, right...
"It'll get better." Yeah, yeah, I know. I've heard it all before. "You'll learn to deal with it." When?
Just for today... And if you can't; for the next hour. If that doesn't work: the next fifteen minutes. Or... the next five minutes. Life never really stops spinning either way, does it? In the end the world won't hurt, won't bother no matter what.
"Yeah well, that didn't really happen just now, did it?" No, it's been going on for the past seven years! Where the fuck have you been?
Is it right? To lay it all down on something like this? I don't know... I don't think so. Your actions cause ripples. They grow into waves and tsunamis; it takes down everything you've ever built up.
"Is there anything to feel, is it pain that makes you real? Cut me off before it kills me...
Take another piece of me, give my mind a new disease. And the black and white world never fades to gray..."
Put one foot in front of the other... That's it. One minute at a time. I'm sorry I didn't share. No... really I'm not. But maybe it'd be easier somehow. For my own sake I'm sorry because it would have made things so much easier. But I didn't and here I am. I'm not sure I believe it myself, it sounds so stupid.
"And here she goes again... Craving attention." Yeah... that's it! I love doing it like this, I've never felt better about it! Second: if you don't want to bother, don't! I never asked you to give a shit, now did I?
It's so much easier to blame it on someone else, no matter what it is. If anyone should know it's me. I've spent my entire life blaming others, or at least the past 8-9 years of it. It's easier because you won't have to deal with it. But talking's cheap, and actions speak volumes. A raised eyebrow can send you to hell and back or make a person question their entire day. A sarcastic sentiment can cost you your head. At least right now. Taunting someone because you've started something you can't stop makes it worse in any form. And admitting when your wrong takes a lot more balls than pulling a trigger.
You can't undo what you've done, but you can try to make people understand the cause of your actions even if they aren't excuses. What I've learned and is working to accept is that a mistake doesn't make you a bad person, it's what you do afterwards that counts. A million mistakes doesn't make you a bad person as long you feel regret and do your best to make amends. That still doesn't excuse mistakes but often times it explains them. Sometimes an explanation can mean more than you know. And to be able to never ask for forgiveness but prove that you are sorry without expecting anything in return takes more balls than I have right now.
I've been told that the greatest thing you can do is ask for help when you feel incapable of handling something on your own. I still don't feel remotely brave; just stupid. How could I be so stupid that I didn't ask earlier? Pride, I guess. It's good to be proud, you just have to find the right thing to be proud of, the things that doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else.
So therefore I don't ask for forgiveness, I've stopped feeling sorry for myself and for those of you who, for some miraculous reason, still do: Don't. All I ask is that you be patient or leave me alone. I'm not asking you to understand because I still don't. But I am asking you to respect it. How you decide to do that is up to you...
"There's so many wars we fought
There's so many things we're not
But with what we have
I promise you that
We're marchin on
We're marchin on
For all of the plans we've made
There isn't a flag I'd wave
Don't care where we've been
I'd sink us to swim
We're marchin on
We're marchin on"
You are the only one who can change yourself, no one is going to do that for you; they've all got their own shit to deal with. All they can do, if they feel like it, is show you the door. You're the one who has to walk through it...
This is it, isn't it? "You're lucky you're still young..." Yeah, fuck you.
//Em
Just for today... And if you can't; for the next hour. If that doesn't work: the next fifteen minutes. Or... the next five minutes. Life never really stops spinning either way, does it? In the end the world won't hurt, won't bother no matter what.
"Yeah well, that didn't really happen just now, did it?" No, it's been going on for the past seven years! Where the fuck have you been?
Is it right? To lay it all down on something like this? I don't know... I don't think so. Your actions cause ripples. They grow into waves and tsunamis; it takes down everything you've ever built up.
"Is there anything to feel, is it pain that makes you real? Cut me off before it kills me...
Take another piece of me, give my mind a new disease. And the black and white world never fades to gray..."
Put one foot in front of the other... That's it. One minute at a time. I'm sorry I didn't share. No... really I'm not. But maybe it'd be easier somehow. For my own sake I'm sorry because it would have made things so much easier. But I didn't and here I am. I'm not sure I believe it myself, it sounds so stupid.
"And here she goes again... Craving attention." Yeah... that's it! I love doing it like this, I've never felt better about it! Second: if you don't want to bother, don't! I never asked you to give a shit, now did I?
It's so much easier to blame it on someone else, no matter what it is. If anyone should know it's me. I've spent my entire life blaming others, or at least the past 8-9 years of it. It's easier because you won't have to deal with it. But talking's cheap, and actions speak volumes. A raised eyebrow can send you to hell and back or make a person question their entire day. A sarcastic sentiment can cost you your head. At least right now. Taunting someone because you've started something you can't stop makes it worse in any form. And admitting when your wrong takes a lot more balls than pulling a trigger.
You can't undo what you've done, but you can try to make people understand the cause of your actions even if they aren't excuses. What I've learned and is working to accept is that a mistake doesn't make you a bad person, it's what you do afterwards that counts. A million mistakes doesn't make you a bad person as long you feel regret and do your best to make amends. That still doesn't excuse mistakes but often times it explains them. Sometimes an explanation can mean more than you know. And to be able to never ask for forgiveness but prove that you are sorry without expecting anything in return takes more balls than I have right now.
I've been told that the greatest thing you can do is ask for help when you feel incapable of handling something on your own. I still don't feel remotely brave; just stupid. How could I be so stupid that I didn't ask earlier? Pride, I guess. It's good to be proud, you just have to find the right thing to be proud of, the things that doesn't hurt yourself or anyone else.
So therefore I don't ask for forgiveness, I've stopped feeling sorry for myself and for those of you who, for some miraculous reason, still do: Don't. All I ask is that you be patient or leave me alone. I'm not asking you to understand because I still don't. But I am asking you to respect it. How you decide to do that is up to you...
"There's so many wars we fought
There's so many things we're not
But with what we have
I promise you that
We're marchin on
We're marchin on
For all of the plans we've made
There isn't a flag I'd wave
Don't care where we've been
I'd sink us to swim
We're marchin on
We're marchin on"
You are the only one who can change yourself, no one is going to do that for you; they've all got their own shit to deal with. All they can do, if they feel like it, is show you the door. You're the one who has to walk through it...
This is it, isn't it? "You're lucky you're still young..." Yeah, fuck you.
//Em
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